Why Most Christian Movies Suck

So the trailer to Exodus: Gods and Kings was just released, and the evangelical Christian community will probably freak out like it did for Noah.

What really annoys me about the Christian community is their views toward biblical hollywood films. People freaked out about Noah but all gathered around God’s Not Dead. I’ll admit that I haven’t seen either, but from what I have heard, Noah was okay, and God’s Not Dead was terrible both story wise and Christian wise. Apparently GND makes everybody who is not Christian seem really amoral and in the end apparently some of them either die or get sick or something bad happens to them?? That’s just foolishness, yet the evangelical community rallied behind it because it’s a “Christian” movie. The same goes with Heaven is for Real. I heard it was not good, and also somebody going to heaven and coming back is just unbiblical, but Christians ate it up and use that book to defend the Christian faith. Guys, we’re allowed to not like Christian media. It’s not scripture, and if it’s mediocre the Christian community should be the first to criticize it and criticize it the most.

The reason God’s Not Dead and Heaven is For Real are considered Christian movies while Exodus and Noah are not is because the former have an agenda and are made by Christian filmmakers. The story will suffer if the movie has an agenda, whether religious or secular. This is the reason I do not have a problem with the movie This Is the End. Yeah, it had bad theology, but the movie obviously is not meant to be taken seriously, and It did not set out to make fun of religion unlike it’s horrible counterpart Rapture-palooza. It just wanted to tell a story.

Anyway, I’ll only have a problem with this new Exodus movie if it tells a bad story. Obviously it’s not going to be 100% accurate to what the bible says because there isn’t always enough to make a two hour movie (ex. the bible says nothing about Moses and Rhamses’ relationship before Moses goes to Midian), but I believe that as long as they set out to tell a story for the sake of telling a good story and don’t drastically alter the characters or message, which they usually don’t, it’s okay. The bible tells compelling stories, compelling enough that nonbelievers are willing to spend millions of dollars to tell them, so I say let them. I will say, however, that there is one thing that already really bothers me about Exodus. These are the whitest Egyptians I have ever seen.

P.S. There hasn’t been a good biblical movie since The Prince of Egypt. That movie is awesome, but I will say this: the book is always better than the movie.